Most of us recognize the importance of meeting the expectations of people in our lives. Approval from other people forms the basis of our perception of self worth and often the person we present to the world is the one that we believe will please the most people. JSAPA Weight Loss Surgery patients have had to deal with a variety of negative attitudes and comments from those around them for most of their lives. When we are judged by others because of our size, there is an almost inevitable consequence of lowered self-esteem. 

Couple the negative attitudes of other people with the negative self-talk after failed attempts at weight loss, and obese individuals are often filled with self doubt and insecurities.

As much as we wish it were not so, we cannot control the thoughts, prejudices, and unkind comments of other people. What we can do however, is chose how we react to feedback from other people and to what extent we allow it to affect us.  

Consider the following tips for dealing with negativity that may interfere with your self-esteem:

Everyone has the right to feel good about themselves – especially you. Tell yourself this at every opportunity. Any chance you get, tell yourself out loud “I have the right to feel good about myself.”  The more you hear it the faster you will believe it.

Give yourself permission to feel good about who you are. There is nothing bad about liking yourself. Consider the possibility that everyone who ever made an unkind statement or tried to make you feel bad were simply wrong. You are a good person, and it is okay to feel that way.

Use affirmations to undo negative programming. Statements that you can repeat to yourself that affirm your worth are called affirmations. Go online and select some affirmation statements that you feel are particularly appropriate to you. Repeat each statement throughout the day. To begin with, you may feel a little silly, but this is a proven method for changing negative thoughts so try it and experience the power of improved self-confidence.